Tuesday, July 6, 2010

Wedding Issues, My Non-Band Secret, and New Low (141)

I debated whether to even post this because this new low may be temporary...but I am still excited. I am down to 141.6 this AM. I have lost about six pounds in the last month, which is a lot for me. Some of it may be/probably is related to wedding, etc. drama It seems like many, many things have been going wrong lately, causing more anxiety for me. I have always had an issue with losing weight when I'm anxious about an upcoming event (and for other reasons too). But this seems to be the biggest event ever for me and is a lot more work than I bargained for...with a lot more opinions and problems than I thought possible. With other issues that have cropped up too (of a non-wedding nature), I think that the stress may have something--or even everything--to do with my loss. But can I take it as a loss even if temporary? I hope so. :)

Whatever the case, I'm fitting in the dress fine--actually, adding the petticoat underneath made it a little more snug than I would've wanted at my earlier weight (didn't factor that in previously for some reason). So everything is good on that front, and since the wedding is Saturday, I doubt I will have any super huge fluctuations in weight--although my stinkin' period is scheduled to arrive that very day. Lovely! Usually when I am stressed, my period arrives later rather than earlier--and I get acne (and big time when I'm stressed) and become bloated for a time before it starts. So this is all wonderful. But at least I don't have to worry about my overall weight (bloating is only a couple of pounds--not sixty). I know a lot of brides are stressed about that (I have been watching loads of WETV bride shows lately as I put together favors--wedding overload, I tell ya! :) ). In fact, somewhere around the time I was banded--perhaps even a little before--I read that one of the top regrets brides have about their wedding day is their weight.

And I'll let you all in on a little secret (yes, I'm secretive even on my blog which doesn't bear my name on it--or my picture yet (since the camera theft--have I mentioned that here?-I have decided that I want one of my bridals to be my first picture...I'm dramatic like that :) )...anyhow, back to the secret...I am already married. No, I'm not a bigamist in the making. It is to my wonderful guy I'm about to marry publicly (who, as you'll notice, I haven't oft called my fiance). We got married around the time I was having kidney stones. My great grandmother died of bladder cancer when she was young, and we were very worried that I might have cancer as I had gone to the doctor a couple of times initially with no answers). I didn't have insurance at the time...and he needed his Greencard, so it was perfect (just kidding about the Greencard--he's totally a citizen :) ). We were engaged a few months before I started having symptoms, and he wanted to get married fairly quickly anyway (that's how great I am...heehee :) ).

I wanted to wait to lose weight because I had only lost about 20 pounds at that point, plus I wanted a church wedding and wanted my parents to be there (well, actually, we both wanted the latter two). We did something simple and decided to keep it under wraps because we didn't want anyone to feel left out and wanted to definitely have the formal ceremony (I know that some people care less about the formal stuff, but it was really important to us--yes, even him). We believed that if we told people, they wouldn't feel that they should come (which has proven to be the case since our secret has been leaked, and some family members have voiced that they aren't going because they believe we should've had it all at the same time--this has nothing to do with gifts or anything, by the way, as no one ever sent any last year nor did we solicit them in any way since we were going the secretive route). I guess I didn't want people judging my second wedding situation either since it is unconventional (probably why I refrained from posting it here--even though I know 99.9% of commenters have been supportive and great, I am always worried about what people think of me and my decisions...working on that).

Anyhow, we had a photographer (the one friend we let in on the secret at that time--months later, I told a couple of others including our lovely local bandit ladies--not the secret leakers, don't worry ;) ) at the ceremony. I have seen posts from others on here who, at bigger weights, really look great and carry it well. I am sorry to say that I am NOT one of those types. It was depressing to look back on pictures from a time when I even felt pretty good about myself (was even wearing a sleeveless dress, which I hadn't done in years) because I had just lost some weight. I hate how that dress looks on me now (is that bad to say since I felt good that day I wore it?). The white sleeveless situation probably exacerbated my flaws, but it was just something I felt I needed to wear for the wedding. So...saying all that...I am hoping that I feel a lot better about the pictures this year at this weight. Maybe that will take away some of the weight regret from the earlier wedding.

Anyhow, my new weight puts me at a BMI of 22.2 (I'm 5'7), pretty much smack in the middle of the 'Normal' category. I am also 60 pounds down today too (I know that's not much for a lot of you :) )! :) I really want to be in the 130's. My goal is still 127 (I still have a bit of belly, upper thigh, and booty fat that could stand to be shed--and some arm action too, so I don't think this is too crazy), but I am SUPER HAPPY where I am. I just think it's always good to have goals--maybe strive for something great and likely get somewhere pretty darn good--if that makes any sense.

I was one of those folks who was worried that the band would not work for me--especially since I was a low-BMI bandster upfront (still obese, of course, but lower on the spectrum of obesity). I was thinking I might be lucky with a 40-pound loss--and was fine with that if I was lucky enough to get there. The band was a little like rolling the dice for me in guaging how much I might be able to lose since low-BMI bansters don't have as much to lose and since some charts show lower and others shower higher figures for percentage of excess (above Normal BMI) weight lost. I continously played with the numbers upfront and would gauge anywhere from 10-40 pounds being what I could likely lose with the charts/figures/percentages I saw (although I still held to my goal as I am an optimist). All the while, for several months early on, I didn't lose a single pound. It wasn't until about April that I began to lose--and I was exercising, so I figured that exercise must be why I was losing and that the band just wasn't right for me. But since then, even in exercise lulls, my weight has remained pretty steady or has gone down (aside from this possible stress-induced hiccup I'm encountering at present). And I am now at sixty down...it's crazy really! I love what the band has done for me. My HUSBAND :) reminded me this morning of my early-on concerns about it not working when I was sharing with him my excitement about my new low (I still don't let him see the scale :) ). As many of you have said, I would definitely do this again if I needed to. I am so blessed, and I am so glad it worked for me.

39 comments:

  1. Wow, what a success you are! I hope your wedding is all you dreamt it would be. I know you'll be a beautiful bride. I can't wait to see the photos!

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  2. Congrats on the new low!! I cannot WAIT to see you as a beautiful bride! Take it easy and don't let other people's opinions ruin your day! Soak it all up and enjoy your day being a skinny bride! you deserve it!

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  3. I am so happy to hear you are doing well! 60 lbs down is fantastic! I can't wait to see the bridal photo/big reveal :)

    Have a wonderful time this week and try to take it all in a relax (hard to do, I understand, but try! :))

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  4. Congratulations on the new low! I can't wait to see pictures. Also thanks for the info on the no loss for a while. I am also a low BMI bandster who is having trouble with the superslow losses.

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  5. Can't wait to see the photos! Congrats on the upcoming official wedding celebration and your new low (hey, we're the same BMI!).

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  6. I can not wait to see your wedding pictures! I was just thinking about your wedding because I remembered it is the same day as my Mom's b-day. Have a great day and enjoy it!! I love your secret - they just did a thing on the radio about people who got married secretly and tons of people called in with similar stories.

    xoxoLinda

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  7. WTG on the new low!

    Well, you know my opinion about the naysayers since I shared in person. This is your and your guys day. Who cares if it a was already "legally" done. I so wish I could be there, Bryan not being home yet is just throwing a kink in everything.

    I'll be in town on the 12th for my last doc appt...I can't remember if you were doing a honeymooon or not.

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  8. Enjoy your wedding! I bet that the people who decided not to come are people you won't really miss anyway.

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  9. Looking forward to the wedding pics!

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  10. Awwww...I love you guys!!!!! :) :) :)

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  11. Wow! You are doing so great! I'm only at 150.8 right now -- and you're an inch taller than me! Can't wait to see your photos. And, congratulations on your weddings . . the new one AND the secret one! :)

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  12. First of all...congrats on your 60 lb loss! I too am a low bmi bandster (I was 34 when I was banded in March) and I've only lost 21 lbs so far. I too have those same doubts that maybe its not working but I know that it will, its just coming off slower than I'd like!

    I did the same thing when I got married and it also had to do with health insurance. We were engaged and were planning a Sept. 08 wedding when my husband decided we should get married in april 08 when he was retiring. We looked into it before and knew that he could add my kids and I after he retired but he said he would feel better knowing everyone was covered before he retired. We told our parents and the kids...no one else and went on to have the "wedding" in Sept!

    Enjoy your day and I cannot wait to see the wedding pics!

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  13. Darl,
    60 pounds off is 60 pounds off. Of course it's a fantastic effort. You didn't have as much to lose as some of us. I cannot believe you are sitting on 141 pounds you skinny little bugger xx.
    Cant wait to see your wedding pics.

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  14. You are really doing awesome! 60lbs is huge! No pun intended. :)

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  15. Fantastic. 60 pounds is great and for someone who didn't have as much to lose as many of us it is more of an achievement.

    And I am still in hiding as well on my blog, so I know how big of a deal it is to come out publically. I can't wait to see the pics, I am sure you are beautiful.

    I would love your support on
    www.bandedup.blogspot.com

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  16. CANNOT WAIT to see the pics!!!! :)

    I kind of wish I lost weight when I go through stressful situations...I'm the opposite, I have to fight really hard not to resort to stress eating. Oh well!

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  17. You are a real inspiration for me because I too am on the lower end of the 'band spectrum' and am constantly concerned that it won't work for me because of that reason! Sounds crazy but its what I think of when I get a fill and still feel nothing. Anyway, thanks for the post and I look forward to hearing all about the big day!

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  18. 花花公子的責任就是要很平均的愛他認識的每一個女孩子~~我們的責任則在於公平的回應每一篇blog............................................................

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  19. 先為別人的快樂著想,是超人;先為自己的快樂著想,是凡人;使別人不快樂,自己也不快樂的,是笨人。..................................................

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  20. YAY you are married and the wedding must have been wonderful! Can't wait for pics.

    And you are totally SKINNY OMG I can't even begin to dream about numbers starting with 1-4!!!

    Thanks for this post. I was not as low BMI as you to begin with, but lower than many, and I still worry that I will be stuck at a size 12/14 for the rest of my life and the band will stop working for me. You show us all that it can be done!

    Congratulations on EVERYTHING! You deserve it all.

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  21. 唯有用熱情、用智慧去觀察事物,這事物才會把他的秘密,洩漏給我們............................................................

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  22. Congratulations on your wedding and can't wait to see pictures! (I know I'm late, but wanted to congratulate you anyway! :)

    xoxo

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  23. 生命的意義,是在於活的充實;而不是在於活得長久。......................................................

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  24. 河水永遠是相同的,可是每一剎那又都是新的。. . . . . . . . . .. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

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  25. 知識可以傳授,智慧卻不行。每個人必須成為他自己。. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

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  26. 唯有用熱情、用智慧去觀察事物,這事物才會把他的秘密,洩漏給我們......................................................................

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  27. Awwwww congrats!!! I had no idea (well, how could I, you secret keeper!!!).

    Congrats, Congrats, Congrats!!!!

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